Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Nutmeg? What a pervert!

So, Armin Meiwes, the German Cannibal likes his human meat sautéed with salt, pepper, garlic and nutmeg; on the side, Princess Croquettes, Brussels sprouts and a green pepper sauce? However, as we all know, from Texas to the Bronx and places beyond that man tastes like pig roasted, toasted or fried...but, with nutmeg? What a freak! To think that they sentenced him to only 15 years: for such a gastronomic creation, they should have give him life. Nutmeg is too sweet of a spice and lacks the flavor of mace, no matter what country, no matter what race, but what can one expect from a sloth of a Goth? Meiwes, it is said, found the meat a little tough, what a boar! For three days, maybe four, he should have marinated it in French wine, and rendered a meal which even Michelin would have thought divine. Instead, like a Cretan, he left the rest uneaten; to be frozen…squirreled away for 15 years and a night where he can try again to get it right.

Anybody who has ever read the story of the making of John Huston’s “African Queen,” will remember that they were served “Long Pig” by the hunter they had contracted to bring them meat. Not until the authorities came to their camp and arrested their independent contractor for slaughtering their “Bearers,” did they have the slightest inkling that their sundry evening barbecues should have been sautéed with salt, pepper, garlic and mace; on the side, princess croquettes, Brussels sprouts and a green pepper sauce, but never a stew.
Ah, what gauche cannibals we humans are!
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